Reiki Practitioner, Certified Holistic Health Coach, + BSN, RN
For so long I was unconfident in my mind, my body, and my spirit. I longed to fit in because growing up I felt so different. It’s like I knew who I was, but I second guessed it. And so, I did what most of us do, I morphed and I people-pleased my way through life. Became a professional chameleon and shapeshifter. Shifting into whoever that person wanted me to be in that moment. Turned off my intuition, my gifts, and my divine feminine. I tried to be the person I thought I should be and fought the person I was, and because of those decisions I kept walking farther and farther away from myself.
I developed an eating disorder that took everything from me including my friends, my family, my body, and almost my life. It wasn't until I was told I was literally going to die that I decided to change my ways. In the time I had my eating disorder my mom offered to get me breast implants, thinking it would help heal my body image. Little did she know, she was only confirming to me what my eating disorder thoughts had been telling me all along that, “there was something wrong with me, that I wasn’t good enough the way I am.” And so, I listened to her, went against my inner Knowing, and got them.
Not even 3 years later, I got sick. Months later…I found out I had breast implant illness. A type of autoimmune condition that affects every single organ system in your body. My digestive system, nervous system, endocrine system, musculoskeletal system…all shut down. At first, I couldn’t connect the dots, I wondered, “why me?” I became a victim to my life not realizing that this wasn’t happening to me, it was happening for me. When I finally had the time to get quiet and turn my gaze within, I saw the truth. I wasn’t living in alignment. I wasn’t living in or heading towards my purpose. I was constantly going against my inner Knowing, trying to shut it out. I didn’t trust myself or life and I was deeply in the midst of my dark night of the soul.
And the dark night of the soul is a death/rebirth cycle unlike any other. And what dies is the egoic sense of self. It can last days, months, years. For me, mine lasted years. Unbecoming, unlearning, and challenging your conditioning is hard. Many times throughout those years I tried to resist it. I tried to force things to happen instead of surrendered to the flow – of myself, life, my timeline.
My major turning point was when I spontaneously booked a women’s plant medicine retreat and 3 days later was headed to New York. The retreat, in and of itself, was life changing. But it was the plant medicine that opened my eyes to me, my truth, my light. It reminded me that there is a sacred home within me. One of pure unconditional love and acceptance. One that can be tapped and tuned into at any moment in time. That I am a magical, potent healing force within this world. and my purpose is to share my truth, my stories, my life – to heal the collective. to show you that you are the medicine you need. to help you slay your inner negative tendencies and help you gain clarity about you and your purpose, your path, your life mission. To help you live the biggest life you possibly can.
I left that retreat and 4 days later was attuned to reiki. I found through my birth chart and human design the truth and essence of who I am. My cosmic blueprint. and one of the things it showed me is that my strongest sense is touch. That my true gift is to be a healer and to use my hands to do it. I can finally say that today I feel more confident in my mind, body, and spirit than ever. I attribute this to the fact that I spent many years doing deep soul work. Sticking to the daily practices that make me feel like me. My devotion to daily meditation, journaling, breath work, self-reiki. And through all of this, I unveiled myself. I removed the blindfold and have become the strongest version of myself on the inside and the out.
My goal now is to help others experiencing similar struggles to mine to come home to their selves. to heal not only their physical bodies, but their mind and spirit as well. to build a life they love. to show them that it is possible to rewrite the stories we have told ourselves for so long and tear the pages of the past. If you are on your own journey to come into alignment with truest, deepest version of yourself and to heal your mind, body, and spirit then I would be happy to assist you and hope that my offerings and what I share on all my platforms empowers, inspires, and excites you to become who you have always wanted to be (and maybe even more).